Right Thinking Wrong Thinking…Relationships

I see it in status updates on Facebook.

“I won’t let you treat me like that.”

I hear it on the news,

“He only thought he could treat me like that!” Insert finger snap, head swivel, and the flashing lights of a police car as she is arrested for shooting her cheating boyfriend.

Movies, books, newspapers it is everywhere. The problem? We cannot control how others treat us.

Wrong Thinking: I demand that other people treat me right!

Heart Issue: Unforgiveness, bitterness, frustration, anger when someone does not treat you “right.” Not to mention that one person’s view of “right” treatment is not the same as another person’s view.

Actions: You are demanding of certain behaviors. You demand that others listen when you speak, they don’t cut you off when driving, they don’t talk about you behind your back. However you can treat them any way you want and when you say you are sorry they should forgive you. You may even talk about these folks behind their backs when they have wronged you, but you don’t notice because they are the “ones in the wrong.” Since you demand certain behaviors you are not grateful when someone does treat you right. So instead of saying, “Thank you,” you say, “Finally.” Often tirades ensue when inevitably someone mistreats you. You seek out wrongs instead of seeking the best in your relationships.

Right Thinking: I will treat others as I want to be treated regardless of how they treat me.

Heart Issue: When you are wronged, instead of anger, sadness ensues. Your heart is bent towards reconciliation, forgiveness, kindness, humility, and gratitude. You trust God to stand up for you and you rest in His Spirit’s work. His Spirit is the one who can change the hearts of those who wrong you. He doesn’t need your help.

Actions: When wronged you forgive quickly. You seek out the best in your relationships. You are grateful for kindness and courtesy. Your actions are dripping with grace. If confrontation is necessary it is done in love and grace, not in an entitled, demanding way.

Disclaimer: If someone is abusing you physically or emotionally you need to get to a safe place and find help! There is no right or wrong thinking. Get yourself safe.


Do you see this kind of thinking in the world today? What do you think? How can you help get rid of the stinking thinking?

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